Have you seen The Big Chill? A group of college friends gets together for a weekend reunion after one of their group has passed away, and they spend the weekend getting to know each other again after all of their individual successes have done away with their youthful idealism. ...Yeah, this post is about a little something like that!
Not in a depressing way, just in a very real, "that movie is so well known because it addresses something that happens to a lot of thirty somethings" way. The switch from bright eyed and bushy tailed to sleep deprived and financially unstable is a steady one, not sudden, and it can be exhausting! Similarly, one of the things I really appreciate about this season of Girls (say what you will about that show, but I love it) is that it seems the characters are finally realizing that things are difficult in your late twenties and you have to work for the life you want:
Shosh: I just don't understand why nobody tells you how bad its gonna be in the real world. Marnie: Yeah they do. It's pretty much all they tell you.
"Figuring it all out" is not an easy process, but it is a process that shapes you, and molds your character, and defines the things that matter most to you.
Clearly, the things that matter to me are colors and clothes. And silly faces.
Suffice it to say, my friends and I are still figuring it all out. Nobody is perfect! But the best part is, it seems our generation is slightly fixated on this concept. We're all working our asses off (sorry Mom) to find ourselves, but we're also becoming more accepting of each other when it becomes clear that no one really has it locked down.
I feel so supported by my friends in this endeavor called "life" these days, truly. It's just so comforting that we can sit around in a gorgeous Brooklyn apartment, drinking wine with ladies from our high school class we haven't seen in years, eating strange Panda snacks and talking about our careers or our dreams or our relationships or our new television obsessions, and everyone just seems to get it. They get where I am because we're all kind of in that place: trying to find the balance between reaching for the stars while we have no mortgages and fewer responsibilities, and liking the feeling of being able to pay our cable and electricity bills in the same month.
The Big Chill addressed some of these very issues - where's the balance? How far do you "go confidently in the direction of your dreams" before you have to make a u-turn and face a harsher reality? At one point when the group is discussing adulthood and their new, somewhat unexpected responsibilities, one character says, "Nobody said it was going to be fun. At least, nobody said it to me."
It may not be all fun, but damn if I'm not having a good time of it anyway...and I think that's in large part to the people around me. Thanks, you guys!
This sappy post brought to you by back to back vacations to visit said friends.
*outfit photos taken by Kate Thorman